Well, well, well…I write again! I’ve had my first varsity game, and it went smoothly with coaches thanking myself and my partner afterwards. There has been a moment where a kid shot a three from beyond the NBA range and nailed it at the buzzer. There was another buzzer beater last night in a town in the middle of nowhere Oregon. It’s those moments I live for as an official, but I want to talk about applying officiating to real life and real situations.
Last night, I had to give a girl in my life her second technical foul and throw her out of the game and off my court. Now, most won’t know the situation and circumstances surrounding this ejection, but it was warranted believe me. As officials, we hear so many excuses from players, coaches, and fans that listening to them in our personal lives are the last thing we need. Now, I have been dealing with this girl and her excuses for almost a full month, and the sick part is I’d never met her in person. Modern day technology has given us the opportunity to have relationships with people through the internet, and cell phones that seems to have screwed up the younger generation’s idea of health and happiness. Why I even made it a month is laughable!
Every time we went to meet, this girl had a new excuse, yesterday she said she was sick which may even be the truth, but I really don’t care anymore. There is a breaking point to us all isn’t there? We take so much from people and then we have that certain point that we will not take any more. With players and coaches, we give them a little leeway to complain and moan about calls we have made. In relationships, we give room for excuses and alibis but we trust that they are truthful. Now I have no proof that this girl is a liar, I wish I did. The only facts I have are, she showed me pictures of herself, we had talked on the phone, and that’s about it. What kind of proof is that? It’s not real life, it’s not make believe, I guess it’s the internet world of relationships. I do not enjoy it.
I am too used to being an enterprising person of sorts, I have boundless energy thrown into my passions and I guess I can’t understand people who do not give their 110%. Perhaps my standards are too high, I expect too much from people and relationships, but it is the standard I try to live. Sometimes people can push you too far, they like to test your limits just to see what they can and cannot get away with. When this is done on a basketball court with me, it is a simple boundary I observe and when it is crossed, the technical foul occurs. In real life situations, there are certain boundaries that if crossed I will walk away. Too many times people stoop to a level of ensign instead of taking control of their own ship as the Admiral. I am not one of those people, and I hope those reading this are Admirals too, for life is too short to play games with liars and cheats, excuse makers and drama fakers. Indeed, life is meant to be savored and cherished by those who surround you in love and support you in love. I’m afraid the girl in my life has never found love, and as bad as she wants it and needs it, because of her desperate loneliness she may never find it. Putting people to the test is like poking a sleeping rattlesnake with your finger and bare arms with no antidote. I feel sorry for people who feel that life is found in other’s suffering. I hope this girl one day finds happiness, I’m just glad that I had a chance to know her briefly and learn quickly that the snake needs to be left alone. When I T’d her up, I got angry and took it a little personally, but that happens in a game too. When I calmed down later, I learned a lot about myself, what I have taken away from this I know will help me to find a good person in time.
Set your boundaries on the court, set your boundaries in life and stick to them. When they are crossed, try to be calmer than I was, but certainly let that person know with clear communication that they have crossed the line. Stand firmly on the fact that you know yourself and you know what you want in life, let no one get in the way of that because they have their own path to follow. It’s good to be writing again.
David
